personal perceptions on social interactions and why i am okay with saying goodbye
Chances are, when you let go of a relationship it’s either because you’ve decided it’s a bad one or communication ceased for whatever reason. Often letting go is an event in itself because we’ve been taught that stopping is like quitting and quitting means failure. When I express the ease in which I choose to estrange myself from another, one might quickly conclude that I am either harsh or lack empathy. While I do see relationships differently, I am still an incredibly emotional person. Though, I am able to discern the benefits of being honest with oneself and living with the integrity of the constant “now,” which abhors the misconception of human ownership and accepts change. I am not to be kept by anybody and I do not keep anybody. We are our own beings who are free to do as we wish. You are not objects to be replaced or thrown away. If I have ever met you, you will never be replaced no matter what because in my mind it is impossible. People are not things I collect or even relationships, to me. Instead, everyone is like a moment that I’ve experienced. They are beautiful, surprising embellishments to my life. My core being is driven by self-discovery, creation, and the search for knowledge. There is no room for my existence to be rooted in others. Every single day, I am a new person. Every hour, minute, second. Everyone is. You are completely different from yourself a month ago. Change is neither good nor bad, it just is. It is inevitable. It is not something to mourn over. The past has happened and it is gone. You meet someone new who wears the face of somebody you’ve “known” for months and if you don’t connect, it’s okay. Nothing is forever, people are malleable. Even if I wanted to, I could not force somebody into time traveling to fit a mindset of before. Instead, they were like a pretty sunset I saw or a funny joke I read or a sad song I heard. Nothing is for me to keep, only to experience and appreciate until the moment inevitably transitions into something else. Things will come and go. The attempt to hold onto something that has passed is to compromise the integrity of this moment right now. I used to feel scared that nobody would ever understand me, but now I understand that nobody will ever fully know me and it’s just fine. Hello, my name is Alekx Schneebeck. I don’t believe we’ve met before.